Friday, December 31, 2021

Happy New Year!


            
 

Happy New Year! Can You Believe It? I am extremely excited!!

Let's hold on to the things that bring us the most joy and let go of the things that do not.

Let's close the doors that no longer fulfill our hearts and stir our soul
And let us open the door to all the things that we deserve and desire.

Let's move forward with fierceness and determination.  Stampede our hearts with what moves us to make the necessary changes for our highest good.

Let go of the hurt that someone else may have caused.  Remember, they are hurting, and know no other way but to bash and throw tantrums, let them.

The effect of their actions will remind them, how foolish it was to stunt their own growth.

Let us all be rewarded for standing our ground and taking the high road.
Pave it with intent.

Happy New Year Everyone!  Thank you for all your love and support! 💓💓💋💋💚💜💙💘💘

2022.....💥💨💨💨.!!!!!


Peace & Love😍

Lavidus






Wednesday, December 29, 2021

Stay Up!







If you would like to follow along, click the Podcast link to the right. Subscribe & Share! 



Greetings, Beautiful people, how are you on this beautiful Wednesday?

It is raining outside. It is very cold and it's so beautiful. I love getting up in the morning. It has been very very cold.  The weather is changing. Coffee, this morning is on deck.  I am not drinking tea today.  I have actually been doing tea for the last few days. Tea, honey, garlic, or cloves, and all that good stuff. But, this morning I am having coffee because I need a little pick me up.  

I slept very well last night. Very deep.  Have you ever had one of those deep sleeps that you wake up and you stretch and... I don't want to get out of bed?  So I didn't. That's where I am recording, right now, in my bed. So thank you...for joining me.

Today, I want to encourage you guys to Stay Up. Whatever keeps you up, gravitate towards that. Now I know that we are in a transition of times and for some, it may be very difficult. But it's ok.  The birthing process is very difficult. A man can only imagine for those of you mothers who have birth children into this world, you know the process can be painful. But the end result is something beautiful.  A creation that is part of you.  So it's an amazing thing that's happening right now to the collective, so hold on.

These are things that have worked for me to get me through some of my hardest days. It hasn't always been rose petals and sunshine. I've had difficult days. But I've also have learned to change my mind about what I believe difficult is.  Because it's all about perception. It's all about your perception, and that is one of the main things that help create your reality.  Throughout all of this, these are things that have helped me.  These are things that I do and I hope that they help you too.  If there are things that you already have in place already, share them with somebody, that's all I am doing. 

 I am not looking to change your mind about what you believe, and I hope that you are not looking to change mine. What we all should be trying to accomplish and what I am trying to accomplish is, I want to understand our differences, and in that understanding find common ground. Ok, that was a little bit off the subject. But yeah, this is what I am talking about.  We all go through things, but we have to be open to each other to realize how much we have in common.  Our differences are what we have in common. So don't take any of this shit too seriously.  Enjoy the ride.  Enjoy the journey. Enjoy each moment of your life. Because once you find out what it really is, once you find out how you can navigate through his existence flawlessly, it all becomes quite simple.  This neverending maze of life,  don't try to figure it all out. Trust yourself.  Trust in the process, because we can't always have a plan.  You can't always be prepared for life, because it's always happening. 

So on those hard days, give yourself a break. Take time out and appreciate the moment that you're in.  Know that something needed to change, whether you are aware of it or not. Maybe there was a spark that needed to happen. Appreciate those lessons.  They help us grow. Ya, know? But anyway. Here are three of the main ways, I Stay Up!

Peace & Love

Lavidus

For my VIP Patreon members, Click the link below to hear the three ways that I Stay Up when I am feeling down.  If you are not a member, what are you waiting for?  

https://www.patreon.com/relationshiptalkrnu


PhotoCredit:  Stay Up by Lonely In the Rain-Amazon Music

Sunday, December 26, 2021

Sheep People


 I had the pleasure of watching The Matrix and I enjoyed myself.   The movie was explosive and had all the expected ingredients for a well-made movie that makes you question your reality.

Click the link below and become a Bonus or VIP Patreon member to listen to the full episode of Sheep People.  Thank you for your love and support.  Subscribe & Share!





Peace & Love 

Lavidus



PhotoCredit: The Matrix Reloaded (Google)

Wednesday, December 22, 2021

Life is But A Dream



If you would like to follow along, click the podcast to the right. Subscribe & Share!




Row. Row, Row, your boat gently down the stream
Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, life is but a dream

How many of us remember that nursery rhyme?

If life is indeed a dream, what happens when you're awake?  If life is a dream, what are you dreaming about?  Who are you dreaming about?   If you could dream up the life you want, what would it look like?

Dreams are illusions and the illusions are real.  You are everything that you dreamed of right now.  If you want to be something else, just change your dream.  Anything is possible because you are limitless. 

I finally completed all of my shopping and I will be relaxing for the next couple of days. Let's not lose sight of what this season is all about. It's really not about the gifts.  Some of you will receive gifts from people that didn't even want to give you a gift, but they are so caught up in what this season is supposed to mean that, they are going to go against their own judgments.  Don't be that person.  If someone does not deserve a gift from you, don't feel guilty for not giving them one.  People need to be treated like they deserve.  The holidays conjure up all kinds of emotions and sometimes we get lost in them.  Find out what this season really means, then find out what it means to you because that's all that really matters.

I am grateful for today. I am grateful for my life.  There have been harsh circumstances that have occurred in my life that should have broken me. But, I am still here.  If you are reading this, or if you are listening and you have been through a storm or two, congratulate yourself for making it this far.  Thank yourself for not giving up.  Love on yourself, and give yourself a break and acknowledge the fact that you're still here. Unbreakable.  Their plan for you didn't work.  Their opinion of you doesn't matter.  You are still here celebrating life gearing up for the next chapter. So celebrate this new season, relax and bring it on in, because the best is yet to come.

Peace & Love


Lavidus






Photo Credit: Life is But A Dream by Tracy C. Lutz




Saturday, December 18, 2021

We.


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Greetings beautiful people, how are you on this lovely Saturday morning?

I just wanted to take this opportunity to thank all of you who listen to my podcast, who read my books, who read my blog, Thank you.

I really appreciate your support and you taking the time to share my experience.

As I reflect back on the year I really had a lot of decisions to make. One of them was to whether or not to continue my podcast.

I made the decision to continue my podcast because I truly do love it so much.

I enjoy sharing this with you, this way and using this medium to share my experience and give my advice in regards to relationships.
So, thank you very much for sharing this experience with me.  Thank you.

I also want to use this time to encourage you to keep going.
Do not let the end of the year, be the end of anything.  Because where ever there is an ending there is a new beginning.  Each day is a new beginning.  You do not have to wait until January first. You can start right now.

Keep going.

Do not be distracted. Stay focused.

We are all in this together. Whether recognize it or not, and maybe our experiences are different, but we are all in this together.

I hope that you have a great day and I hope that the end of the year brings you all that you deserve, all that you desire, and all that you aspire to have and to gain. And in that same wish, I hope that you are giving in that way.

I hope that you exist in a world where everything is reciprocal. Whatever you give out you get back.  I hope you make the necessary changes to move you forward, to live a good, happy, healthy life.

Peace & Love

Lavidus









PhotoCredit: Mediavine

Wednesday, December 15, 2021

"They"

 If you would like to follow along, click the podcast link to the right. Subscribe & Share! 



When they start talking about what you should be doing when they're not doing shit themselves.

When they have never contributed to your future, but yet feel it necessary to tell you, "It's about time" you got that promotion.  It's about time you left that relationship. It's about time you got married.  It's about time you wrote that book.  It's about time you quit that job.  It's about time you got your shit together.  Yeah? You're monitoring my time, when will it be yours exactly?

When they compare you to people you've never even heard of and expect a response. 

When they watch your every move, except the move that's going to get them left behind.

When they start talking about the who, what, when, and where, it's really none of their business because they were not there.

When they got more problems than a genius with one idea, but want to judge you on your minuscule 
 issues.

When they stand in front of the mirror and still can't see themselves, but be all up in your vision as if they were born to be.
 
When they try to put you in the same little box that they are in and although you clearly do not fit, they will try at any cost until they lose their grip.

When they love who you are and hate that they can't control it.

When they don't have their own thoughts, Cluster B mind, they stole it.

When they are them and you become us, don't get caught on that when 'they' were bus.



Lavidus

Monday, December 13, 2021

What do You Desire?

 



DESIRE: A strong feeling of wanting to have something or wishing for something to happen. 

What do you truly desire?


If you could have all of your desires fulfilled, what would be next?

Do you live out all of your desires every single day?  Or save them for special occasions?

Are your desires hidden in a closet or put out on display for all to see.

That is your life because it really doesn't matter to me. 

But, just for the sake of conversation, What do you desire?

Do you enjoy your guilty pleasures?  Do they make you feel high?  Do you give in to all of your desires, until they make you fly?

Do you starve yourself of what you think you might need the most, blame others for not being able to live your life, and boast?

What do you desire?

To be free, unlimited, and to give in to all that makes you  feel good

To walk in the darkness and the light
To die and live again is pure pleasure when understood

To wake up to satisfaction and go to bed with Grace
Desire is what I see when you gently touch my face

What do you desire?

To walk in pure nakedness and still be unseen
To eat the fruit of life and never feel hunger again

Desire: A strong feeling of wanting to have something or wishing for something to happen.

What do you want? 

What do you desire?



Lavidus


Photo credit: Beware of Dajjal System of worldly desires

Saturday, December 11, 2021

Happy Saturday!




If you would like to follow along, click the podcast link to the right. Or listen on Spotify by clicking the link below.  Subscribe & Share!


I really do not have any  particular thing to say,  or any specific topic to talk about this morning.  I am in a great mood.  I am drinking my ginger tea, with honey and a few cloves.  I feel good. It's about 4:30 a.m, and I wanted to share some of my mood with you.  

It is getting very cold, the weather is changing to accommodate the new season.  It will be raining and snowing heavily where I am beginning, I think on Sunday.  I am pretty excited.  I will be cooking comfort food, staying inside while all this change in the atmosphere takes place.  I will also be writing and recording.  I will definitely be in my space.

What will you be doing this weekend?  Is it cold where you are? Is the weather changing? This is great weather for making love, cuddling. This is considered cuffing season, right?  People actually do get into relationships for the season, and for the season only.  I am sure most of us are past that stage in our lives, but for some people, it's a lifestyle.  Don't get caught out there, falling in love for the season, and be single again when Valentine's Day roll around.  

I usually go to Walmart between 6 a.m and 7.  I prefer to shop early,  there is less contact with people, no lines and I can take my time and actually shop for a few things.  Well, this particular time, when I got there (And I never go to Walmart on a Friday either).  I went around 2:30 in the afternoon and this man followed me all around the store. I even did a small test, because sometimes, I love testing people.  (Don't judge me!) I did a small test to see if he would follow me to the bra section and he passed the lane up, but as soon as I turned the corner there he was, standing there waiting for me to say Hi, or something, I don't know.  Maybe it was a coincidence, but based on how he was staring at me, I felt as if he was following me.  Sometimes when people stare at me for over a minute, I stare back and say, hi or something, ya know, to break the stare. But sometimes people will stare and they won't even say anything, and that shit creeps me out. Have you ever had a complete stranger just stare at you and not even blink? 

Anyway, is it starting to feel like Christmas?  To me, it feels really weird and different. I can't quite put my finger on it.  I am happy and content, but I felt the same way in July, so it being the holiday season, just feels different to me.  Anyone else?  I am sure it's because of all the changes taking place known and unknown, There is a lot going on in the world and in our lives. My advice, just ride the wave.  Keep your head on straight and take care of your mind and heart. One thing is for sure, it will all change. Everything is changing and it's for the better because it's time.  You have to believe that a better day is right now.  Collectively, we can make the biggest changes, tackle the most difficult barriers. Together, we have the most power.  These old systems, paradigms, and old ways of thinking and existing are changing.  So, are you ready?  Are you ready?


It kind of reminds me of a song that I love, by a person that I love and admire, Prince.


Peace and Love, Lavidus


Prince- Let's Go Crazy! 

Dearly beloved

We are gathered here today to get through this thing called life
Electric word, life
It means forever and that's a mighty long time
But I'm here to tell you there's something else
The afterworld
A world of never-ending happiness
You can always see the sun
Day or night

So when you call up that shrink in Beverly Hills
You know the one, "Dr. Everything'll-be-alright"
Instead of asking him how much of your time is left
Ask him how much of your mind, baby
'Cause in this life things are much harder than in the afterworld
In this life, you're on your own

And if the elevator tries to bring you down
Go crazy, punch a higher floor
Woah



Peace & Love


Lavidus






Monday, December 6, 2021

Release...& Let Go





If you would like to listen to this blog post, click the link to the right or below to follow along. Subscribe and Share!



December is here.  It is again the end of another year.  Considering all the things are that are occurring on earth, if you've made it this far, you should have a lot to be thankful for.  If you are not in a place to feel any kind of gratitude, then you should change your attitude about where you are at this present moment.

Your level of gratitude determines your altitude.  The altitude of life, how far will you go, and what are you willing to give up to get there?  Where ever your "there" is. We all have different paths and journeys, sometimes we meet up temporarily, other times it's forever.  But, one of the most important lessons in life will be your ability to let go of the things, people, and places that no longer serve your highest good.  Even the leaves fall off when the seasons change.  Those leaves are replaced with flowers, and green leaves with vibrant colors to represent the new season.  What season are you in? And when it's time, will you be able to shed those old leaves and welcome your new season or will you drag it out?

Sometimes between seasons, we may get stuck in repeating cycles that cause us to question why we exist?  That cycle is meant to bring awareness to your habits and circumstances that you have manifested into your life that you claim you have no control over, and some we don't.  But we do have control over our thoughts.  We do have the power to change the direction of our lives, but we must be willing to clear up the fog and see things clearly and stand alone if necessary.

I used to find it hard to let go of people that I've loved. My loyalty was unappreciated and my love was seen as a weakness and as an emotion that should be taken advantage of.   When you love a person who does not have the ability to love you back, you will eventually be hurt by that person, situation,  or circumstance.  And they too will be affected by their own blind actions that will eventually lead them to the kind of love that they deserve.  That's one of the reasons why it's important to let go and to forgive so that justice can be served.   Anyway, I thought the more I loved him, he would finally see how great my love is, and finally see me for the loving, divine being that I am.  Then I realized,  everyone is not meant to see me and not everyone is meant to receive my love, so I stopped giving it away and gave it to myself, and that's when real love appeared.  That is when the magic started to happen.  People always ask me, why do I look so young? Why does it seem like I am not aging?  Well, my glow comes from my heart,  no creams, lipo, or magic potion, can make up for what is inside me.  And my contact with people is very limited....lol.

Learn to release and let go.  If it no longer represents the you that you are growing towards, the you that you are going towards,  the you that you have become, then let it all go.  Will, it be easy? No.  Will it be worth it?  Yes!  Be brave enough to change your story and start taking care of your heart.

Peace & Love

Lavidus

Friday, November 19, 2021

The Hyena's

Click the link below to follow along. Subscribe and share for the latest!



 The nature of a Hyena is of a scavenger.   

She will throw a lot of stones and show no hands.

She makes a lot of judgments, some of them unsound. Projection is her defense. But if you were to open her closet, the bones will fall out by the tons.

She is always there when you need her, but, show an inkling of independence or success and she will congratulate you to your face and plan your demise behind your back.

Do you have any hyena's in your life? Does any of this sound familiar to you?

Maybe this will help.  She was real cool at first, but then you start to notice the little things.  The sly comments, that indicated her jealousy.  The competition, that you didn't even know existed. And the biggest of all is her ability to be a copycat because she has no personality of her own.

Imagine being hated by someone who wants to be you, but hates the fact that you are you.  What? So once you become me, will you still hate yourself?  Will you hate my skin even more?

When she thought you were beneath her or on equal ground, you were the best of friends.  The moment you start to grow and change and become a better version of yourself and start to be what she thinks she is not, then you become an enemy.  She'll then go looking in the archives that they have stored up for many, many years as ammo.  Because now she has to do something drastic to bring you back down to her level of thought.  She needs you to feel low like she does.

But it never works, because as you have outgrown a lot of things and one of them is "People".  The battle she fights with you is really with herself.  Deep down she knows, she hasn't done the work.  She knows she can't compete.  Trust me, she knows.  And the truth of her reality will soon come to light.

Send love to the hyena's in your life, if you choose to keep them there.  Otherwise, let them dismiss themselves.  Be open to allow them to find themselves through you.  Do not interfere with their process of self-discovery.  When people come after you in malicious ways, for real and unreal reasons, let them.  They'll soon learn a valuable lesson about what it means to be accountable for your decisions.

 So, let those Hyena's hackle.  Have you ever heard a Hyena laugh or bark?  It's pretty damn hilarious. Remain authentic, remain focused and continue to give and receive love.


Peace and Love

Lavidus.





Thursday, November 18, 2021

Eleven Penis's Later...




Click the link below to listen to my perspective regarding a woman who married eleven penis’s.


You can find this episode in my podcast archives.

"She can't even lie about the number of lovers she's had because eleven of them are on record."  Lavidus





Peace & Love



Lavidus

Wednesday, November 17, 2021

Mental Flights.....(A Poem)


If you would like to follow along, click the link below.  Subscribe and share for the latest!



I woke up this morning and I was the Queen of England, so I went back to sleep.

The other day, I was the president, No power, so I went back to sleep.

I've traveled to the fertile lands of Zimbabwe just to plant a seed. I've made love in Dubai just to start a nation.

While in Figi, I dreamed of being in Japan. 

His hands stroked my body with endless intention.....Oh! wait that was a different flight.

While in Egypt, Cleopatra tapped me on the shoulder to warn me of the storm.

Kali is on the way, so get out of the way.

Center your heart around the love you desire
Cloak yourself with sovereignty and clear conscious

Let the fools run wild, soon they'll be tired.

Don't Stoop. Don't budge.  Don't Quit!  

I woke up this morning and I was the Queen of England, so, I went back to sleep.



Peace & Love


Lavidus


(Podcast Background music by Toyko Cafe: Jazz Piano found on Youtube)

Monday, November 15, 2021

Somebody, Somewhere...in Paris.






No one really remembers or bothers people who they believe are Nobodies.  They are usually the people who are not in the limelight but receive a lot of attention.  They don't quite shine like the rest, yet you know that they are there.  Maybe they don't have a million dollars in the bank or a million followers, but you can't take your eyes off of them.

Maybe you have tried all kinds of tricks that have worked so many times before, but with these ones, you have to be beyond clever.  You have to be equipped to see into the future to anticipate their moves. She flows fluid like the water that she beholds.    You will have to be precocious in your pursuit, because nine times out of ten, she will see you coming, already prepared for the conversation in advance.

Who are these people?

They are the people who no one can truly size up because their transformations are unmatchable.  They are the people who can walk into a room and change the vibration.  They are the unknowns that you are so curious about.  They are the ones that come from the dark to capture all that is.  They are the true somebodies.   Listen, they would not bother you if you were not somebody. You are somebody that they are not!  Do not let anyone convince you otherwise.  If you were in a different body, the attention may not be so great, but it is your body, and essence that has them forever captured.  Oh, they can see now.

They are the ones that have slain all opposing factors in several battles known and unknown.  They rise and rise and keep rising until they are fully submerged into a new way of thinking and existing and you no longer recognize them, and you want to battle with an unknown adversary.

All you can do now is watch in disbelief.  Learn and admire this perfectly made unicorn. Catch her if you can.



Peace & Love


Lavidus.
 

(Podcast background music credit:  Youtube: Nigh Paris -Slow Sax Jazz Mix)

Friday, November 12, 2021

Happy Fridaaay!! (What Obstacles?)



Happy Friday!!
Are you alright? If you need a little inspiration to usher you into the weekend.  Click the link below to listen to "What Obstacles?"


Tuesday, November 9, 2021

Real Love Lessons

 

If you would like to listen to this blog post, click the link below.  Subscribe for the latest!


When you give real love to a fake situation, a lesson will soon arrive.  How many times have you given into a relationship, only to find a lesson at the end?  It reminds me of the time I stayed too long with the hopes that a man/child would grow up.  There was a  lesson I had to learn by loving a brick wall and there was a lesson he had to learn for taking real love for granted.  

I believe that we are all here to learn from each other, grow from our experiences, and teach.  Whatever capacity that comes in is determined by your own life path and the decisions you make while you are here.  When it comes to relationships, people teach us about ourselves the most.  The people we share our daily lives with, the people we trust, and the people we choose to love.  If you think you did not choose the life you have right now, then wait on someone else to change it.

Ironically, the lesson of self-love is often learned through other people.  When we allow our boundaries to be broken and stomped on.  When it's "the last time" for the tenth time.  When we allow people who live double lives, triple, and quadruple lives to tell us who we are.  Our self-esteem should have been high enough to make a different decision, but when it is not, there is a lesson that needs to be learned.   Some people are afraid of growth and of being alone, so they stay in situations that keep them comfortable stuck, and delusional.  So for them, it becomes a long-term lesson, filled with animosity, strife, and misery.   And like most life lessons, some are hard to take.   Especially, if you have been the person living selfishly through the ego and not the heart.  

My lesson was, "Lavidus, just because you have the ability to understand and accept a person's situation does not mean that person deserves to be in your life."  Do you mean to tell me that I am loving this person and there is a chance they can not possibly give me back the love that I deserve?  Yes, it's true.  You have been trying to convince him that he is worthy of your love and he has been showing you that he is not.  So, now it's time to let go.  After that realization, it took me another two years to let go.  But once I did, I was free to receive the love that I deserve, and for him, "the karma for you is gone be who you end up with" Cardi B.  

After that relationship, I was single for a long time.  I am not the type of person who runs from one relationship to the next. I need time to process, and release.  Because once I release you, it's like a death for me.  I love deeply, so if I've ever loved you and released you. Well, you know the result.

When you hold onto people that you should have let on ions ago, it only blocks your progress.  There I was in a relationship, hoping for a better option while giving to the option that I didn't want.   Yes, it made a lot of sense at the time.  But in reality, that type of thinking only had me going in circles while having one foot out the door.  You have to be open to receiving what it is that you believe that you deserve because that is exactly what you are going to get.    No way around it.  Thoughts become things.  We have to make a real intentional effort to spend less time with people who just feed off our good irreplaceable energy.   Spend time with people who make us feel good and the energy is reciprocal.  You feel good when you leave that person and can not wait to be in their presence again.   Yes, that is a good feeling.

Don't be afraid to spend time alone, to love on yourself, and to find out who you really are.  Don't be afraid to leave, cut off, remove, dismiss, block anyone in order to preserve your peace.  Remember, misery loves to have your company.  Buildup the resistance to be validated by people or a relationship. Create boundaries and protect your space, so when the next one appears,  you'll spend less time guessing and regretting and more time creating and making love.


Peace & Love


Lavidus.




Sunday, November 7, 2021

I can never be Offended

/////////////////////////////////////// 

 If you would like to listen to this blog, click the link below and listen along.  Subscribe for the latest!

I oftentimes find myself thinking about the way things are.  In my effort to understand this vast world that we live in, I know that I could never be offended by the thoughts of others.

I can never be offended by your ignorance, I see you wear it bright, so let it shine.
I can never be offended by your lack of intelligence or your ability to sum me up without knowing who I am. I don't know who you are either, so why bother?

I can never be offended by your desire to seek and destroy.  I can only hope that you discover yourself in the midst of your mental clouds that bind you to your unsavory thoughts.

I can never be offended by your limited opinion.  It's limited, so I will only expect you to understand me as well as you understand yourself.  The mirror is your friend until it becomes your enemy.  It's not me you see in your mirror, so address your real enemy.

I can never be offended by what you think you see.  Some of you are blind with your eyes open, and illusions are the cane that you lean on to guide you through life. Maybe if I attach myself to a capital letter to claim my existence they will finally see me.  The illusion seems so real until you wake up.

I can never be offended by people I've never met, people who think with their mouths open and ears closed.  People whose perception is as shallow as a puddle on the sidewalk.  A perception nonetheless, that holds existence only in your mind and has nothing to do with nothing.

I can never be offended because that would mean that I resonate with the offense.  It would mean that now I am on your level of the basement and the only way that you can relate to me is to have me beneath you.  Rise up to the occasion.  You see me because I am from the clouds.  I am the sky.  You know I cannot come down, so why even try?


Peace & Love

Lavidus.


Monday, November 1, 2021

Halloweeeen!


                     I hope you had a safe and fun Halloween. 
                                      Hello November!


Lavidus.💕

Thursday, October 14, 2021

Do You "Act Like One"?







Greetings beautiful people.  

How are you on this Thursday?  Are you alright?

Look, Arrogance breeds a lack of foresight and some of you have gone blind.

They want that old thang back.  The stuff they choose is stale, worn out, and haven't been worth the price they paid.

She wasn't a real divine, she just act like one.
He wasn't a real Don Don, he just act like one.
She wasn't a real friend, she just act like one.

He's really not your man, honey, he just act like one.

Look out for those people who just "act like one" because when a real one walks in
It won't be fun.

There is strength in truth and so much weakness in a lie
Be aware of who and what you stand by.



Peace and Love.

Lavidus.

Saturday, October 9, 2021

Thank you!



One of my favorite subjects to talk about has been relationships.  I've had my share, so if sharing my advice through my experience and telling my stories has helped anyone have a better relationship with someone or themselves, then that was my intent. 

It has not always been an easy journey.  On some days I wasn't sure if this was the path that I am supposed to be on. But, it was also a path that I did not want to give up on.  I had to record that next podcast or create that next story.  I had to continue writing, even when there was nothing in my pockets.  Money was no longer the motivating factor.  It has become something that brings me great joy.  To be able to create is the fire that keeps me alive.  Thank you to all who have made donations and shown your support through it all.  It would be incredible if you would continue to show your support by hitting the donate button above, or by sharing my podcast, or by buying my books. This has become my full-time job and because of your support, I am expanding to include other areas that I will share in the upcoming months. 

So make sure you are following me on Instagram @__lavidus_13 or subscribe to my blog at llwalton.blogspot.com. I am currently writing the follow-up to SHAME Love Lies & Lust.  If you have not gotten your copy, you can do so right here on my blog.  You can order an autographed copy from me (Just click the link to the right) or find it on amazon.com and Kindle. 

You can listen to this podcast by clicking the link to the right or this Spotify link:




Thank you all for your continued love and support! 



Peace & Love  

Lavidus. 

Wednesday, August 18, 2021

Laugh Now....Cry Later



Some people may have thought that your situation would never change, but it did.
 You were probably lied on, hated on, and thrown under the bus, by people who you thought loved you.

Wow! Laugh Now, Cry Later.

Some people thought you were weak and would eventually need their help.
(severe Laughter)

Laugh Now, Cry Later

But when those wheels start to turn and that table is made just for you.
The winds of change have brought all that you deserve
The winds of change have brought you all that you deserve
All in plain view

The naysayers become silent shhhhhhhhh
Because now they're the stands 
Front row or nose bleeds

Because you are definitely in demand'

Laugh now, Cry Later

Maybe they tried to put you down
Make you feel like you did not deserve your crown

But who's laughing now?

They used to laugh at your ideas and made fun of your dreams

But who's crying now?

Be careful what you spew, because it will all come back to you

Laugh Now, Cry Later

If you can not reach beyond the star to find out exactly who you are
Leave the US who do, or until you get better

Because trying to interfere with what is divine

You might laugh now, but you will definitely cry later.

Lavidus, Poet, Writer, StoryTeller

Instagram: __lavidus_13




Friday, July 2, 2021

"The Juice"





He said, "I got the juice!"
What juice?

The juice that runs from my veins when I am in pain?
The juice that claims the lives of Kings with no name? 
The juice that pulls me into you. 
What juice?

She said, "I got the juice!"
What juice?

The juice that runs between my legs,' the juice that will make you, and you and you beg,
The juice that births nations,  planted, even in red dirt
The juice that will heal all hurt, cause a tsunami or set you free
 
I AM THE JUICE

Now, do you see?

The juice that flows for eternity
The juice that heals and restores the balance ya' see?
The juice I AM and forever will be

"We got the Juice!"

Yes, we got the juice, cause when you see me, I see you

Through and through time and time again, you are out and I am within.


Lavidus, Poet

If you want to hear the audio of this post. Click the apple link on the top right.  Thank you for your support & love.



Thursday, May 20, 2021

So I have Options....





I used to think nothing of the skills and abilities that I was given.  I could do so many things, with all the gifts that I was given I thought everyone had them.  But, it was not until I got older did I understand the silent hate, from my admirers.  The hidden enemies, and what envy was all about.  I am GIFTED and they saw it long before I did.  So instead of shying away from all that I've been given.  I am going to AMP it up!   I am embracing it all and showing it all off because  I was given options.

I've never been jealous of anyone or felt the need to be envious or compete.  That emotion was left on the back burner when I realized that I could have and be anything that I wanted.  I went as far as testing my ability to overcome obstacles without making them the problem of others.  I owned my mistakes and kept it moving.  I did not feel the need to call a thousand people to confirm my feelings.  From the pain I've endured, I've built a solid foundation of love exclusively for me.  Unbothered by your thoughts, but I know I will forever be on your mind.  It's crunch time and the tables have turned.  What was, is no longer and new beginnings are all over me, and you too if you choose.

I've died and lived several times over, so what you've tried to do I've done and will do it again.  The many lives you've lived are starting to show in your skin, wrinkled from the bend.  You've got to get up real early. I am five x five x ten x two and every day I am born again. So I win again.

I am a late bloomer, so I see it from the back. I'll  Bring it back from the future, so baby please, relax.  I am here to do something different. Something you can feel for eternity.

So I have options.

The Relationship Talk Podcast Raw & Uncut


Lavidus.....


Sunday, May 2, 2021

Penis- A Long Story Short


Since the age of 15 I have been looked at like a sexual object. I have never been one to long for attention from anyone because I have always had it. That's probably why growing up I was such a severe introvert and extremely shy. So now as an adult instead of shying away from being in the spotlight, and ignoring all the attention I get, I welcome it with caution and gratitude.


I used to get real embarrassed by compliments and the stares of men, now I have a better understanding of the female and male dynamics.  There is nothing wrong with being admired. I am a very grounded person and never let any of that go to my head.    Sometimes I flirt, but for the most part I accept the compliments and keep it moving. Now that I have learned that men are more visual creatures and are attracted most to what they see and not necessarily by what they can get, I play with that visual. And fantasy goes a lot further than the reality.

What I find most interesting is when a man offers me his sexual prowess. Of course, he does not right out say it, but what he does do is little things to let me know that he is proud of his ding-a-ling and would like to share it with me. He will say things like, “I miss you”,  even though we’ve only meet a few weeks ago. “You are sexy”, which is something I hear almost every day, but because it’s coming from him, he thinks it’s special. (You would be special if you were mine).  If those compliments do not work, the approach will get more direct.  He will start to talk about how he satisfies in bed and it's a guarantee that I will reach the mountain top! (I have been there several times by myself, so please, any new tricks?)  Usually when a guy has a big ding-a-ling they don’t brag too much, if he had the chance and I should just wait and see. He will just go that extra mile to make his ding-a-ling look a little more appealing than the next man.  Sort of like a human advertisement and his dick is what's being marketed. He will spend more time talking about the sex he wants to have, while I am thinking about the sex he may never get. It’s always comforting to know that when he say's we are two consenting adults, and that we grown, yeah, and 18 year is an adult too, and can do whatever, but does that make it ok? If I hear anything close to having sex on the first date, It's a turn Off.(Panties ON!)

Even if I am the sexiest woman you ever seen, or if you are in the presence of the most sexiest woman you've ever seen, please control yourself, try not to be so obvious. A little mystery keeps me thinking, because if I give it to you the first night, there won't be many other nights, I am tellin' ya!  If I develop a relationship with your penis…I might call and ask where it is, or wonder why it has more personality than you, but it will not get you the committed, satisfying, loving, and mentally stimulating relationship that women like me prefer.  

If a guy has a small pee-wee, then he will kill his self to go down on you, that way you won't be so disappointed in what comes next. If you have a small penis and can't eat, then you are just fucked and expect to be cheated on regularly.  If you can eat, then so what? A woman wants to be fucked every now and then.  Well maybe some don't, I guess I better speak for myself. Sorry, not my rules! But You better have some other fantastic thing you  do, so she can forget about what she won't be getting.

Just a bit of advice...A woman like me can get any ding-a-ling she wants. And if I was interested in women that would be a wrap too.  If I choose to have yours then it's your lucky day, you better be able to bring it! It does not matter how big your penis is, ( and I say that lightly…lol) how well you work it, how long you can last, how well you hit it, or how many positions you get get into, if I don't love you, or feel some kind of attraction, or mental connection, then to me and any others, it will be just a fuck.  And since my "it’s just a fuck" days are over.  BE WARNED! Be clear about your intentions. I will not call you asking for more, I will not answer my phone unless  I feel like it. You will not change the way I feel about you because I will only have developed a relationship with your dick. You are better off spending time with me and getting to know me, that way if the sex is a little lousy, I'll be willing to take the time to show you what really gets me off. So, if you come at me with just your penis to offer then the conversation and the relationship will be very, very short, no matter how long your dick is.

Ok?   Toodles…. Love YOU..

 (Original Post was written over 11 years ago, The Beginning of MySelf )

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 https://open.spotify.com/show/5OqxfkNEbnOgiaeVfbwrmB


Thank you and have a great day!

Saturday, May 1, 2021

Black-The Little Book


"Stella! where are my keys? I am late!

How many times has he been late? How many times has he asked me for keys that I do not use? How many times do I always know where they are, so I reluctantly point in that direction?

“Thanks, don’t wait up.”

Don’t wait up? Why does he say that?  I have not waited up for years. But of course, he didn’t notice.  He never notices.  I have literally become invisible to him and for that I am thankful.  I used to long for his attention, but now I know that this was just a marriage of convenience, no love.  It was a hard realization, but one that also has freed me.  So, when he leaves, I play Black.

Black is a game that myself and other women who are in dead end marriages play.  Each week, we pay to play for our freedom from our mundane lives that are on repeat.  Day in and out we are serving our self-serving husbands.  Some of us believed that we were getting our prince charming or our knight in shining armour, only to wake up to Bob the Barbaric asshole.  It was a necessary route to take and worth the risk of our lives.   Each prize was different, we had no idea what the prize would be but for some, once you get it, it has delivered complete freedom along with a new life and identity.  Something that I am desperate for. 

Our players consisted of Zeena, Marjorie and me.  Zeena is the leader.  She has the highest score and has been playing the longest.  She has been married to Stan, banker, millionaire and theft for over ten years and she is almost on her way out.  Last game she came so close to the prize that we all were cheering for her. He married Zeena to hide his other affairs.  She was his fifth wife, and she was sold the story of riches and unlimited credit cards, only to find out that she is being held captive to be used at his disposal.

Then it was Marjorie.  Marjorie’s husband is considered a wealthy man, but he only spared her a hundred dollars a week allowance, while he spent millions on cars and other women.  He promised her children and the America dream, only to realize that her beauty would used as a reference that he referred to during fundraisers and auctions.   Two years ago, Marjorie tried to commit suicide, but the contract with her husband did not allow her to, so she became a member of the game Black, she saw it as her only way out.

Lastly, it was me.  My name is Stella.  I met my husband at a business conference in Milan.  I have been married to my husband for five years, I was the assistant to his boss.  He only married me to get inside information, once the information was got and he took over the company, our marriage was over. So, here I am waiting to play Black. It was thousands of us, and everyone needed to be logged in, in order to reap the maximum benefit. We knew that if one of us could get through the maze to the Black Book and find out the secret inside, it could be the key to all our freedom.

Zeena had been playing the longest, so we let her take the lead.  Once inside the game you had to tell the truth about your marriage or whatever it is that you are running from.  There were several people running from different things, but there was only one direction you could run into in order to receive the ultimate prize and that was in the direction of the Black Book. 

Several had failed before us.  There were some women, who we never heard from again.  We do not know if they were able to get free or met their doom.  The unknown was the risk, whatever the fate, it would be worth it. Waking up to a stranger is no longer appealing.  I want an emotional connection and not just with my pet.  His neglect has made me stronger, one day I will be free, and I will not look back.

We were all inside the maze and it was go time!  Each corner of the maze was met with a question of whether we loved our husbands or not. Testing our loyalty and out ability to think fast.  The obvious answer would be yes, we loved our husbands, but could you still answer yes, if you knew he was a lying sac of balls?   One wrong answer and you were out of the game, so the truth had to be the truth, even when it was a lie.

 It was good to have aliases who could see where you could not. Maneuvering through the maze was quite tedious.  In some areas you had to run from his mother and x-girlfriends.  On other levels, you had the option of dating his father or brother.  On each level there were obstacles put in your way, but once you make it to the Black level, then the real fun begins. 

The Black level is where you can choose your fate as long as it is in alignment with your true destiny.   If you are not aligned, you will have to start over and repeat the level again.  It was more about yourself and your intentions with whatever you found in the Black Book.  What you found in the Black Book was rooted in your hidden desires, so it was different for everyone.

Beeeeep! Beeeeep! Beeeeep!  was the sound that was made when a player was getting close to the Black Book.  The alarm was the sound of heaven.  It informed everyone that someone was close to the Black Book and their freedom was nearby.  I looked up and it was Marjorie in first place, she was heading for the Back Book and we all watched in awe.

There it was the Black Book in all it’s shining glory, I was just a few feet away and with only one question left to paradise.   I could taste my freedom; it was so close. The black leather was shiny, the ridges were perfectly made and bonded to perfection.  There was a slight glow around the book. I was hesitant to touch it, but the last question, through me for a loop.  “Do you love yourself?”  Do I love myself, what the hell?  Yes!  I love myself.  Yes, I finally love myself.  When I reached out to the black book it began to sizzle.  A slight fog came from the edges.  It began to float in the air and spin in circles.  It looked like a helicopter, getting ready for take-off.  The book flew opened with a great force; a soft warm wind pierced my skin.  The light inside was shining so bright, I could no longer see what was in front of me.  Then, suddenly, I was sitting on a pile of money.  I looked around me and it was all green. It seemed as if I had been transported to another life.  I looked up and the sky was pink.  I looked down and there was a note, “You’re sitting on twenty-thousand dollars use your freedom wisely.”

Written By LL Walton


Original post can be found here:

Black | Viva (vocal.media)

Check out my podcast to the right or Click the link below.

https://open.spotify.com/show/5OqxfkNEbnOgiaeVfbwrmB



UPDATE:

As some of you may know all of my social media accounts have been hacked. If you receive text or calls from my phone or email it not have be...