Real Love Lessons

 

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When you give real love to a fake situation, a lesson will soon arrive.  How many times have you given into a relationship, only to find a lesson at the end?  It reminds me of the time I stayed too long with the hopes that a man/child would grow up.  There was a  lesson I had to learn by loving a brick wall and there was a lesson he had to learn for taking real love for granted.  

I believe that we are all here to learn from each other, grow from our experiences, and teach.  Whatever capacity that comes in is determined by your own life path and the decisions you make while you are here.  When it comes to relationships, people teach us about ourselves the most.  The people we share our daily lives with, the people we trust, and the people we choose to love.  If you think you did not choose the life you have right now, then wait on someone else to change it.

Ironically, the lesson of self-love is often learned through other people.  When we allow our boundaries to be broken and stomped on.  When it's "the last time" for the tenth time.  When we allow people who live double lives, triple, and quadruple lives to tell us who we are.  Our self-esteem should have been high enough to make a different decision, but when it is not, there is a lesson that needs to be learned.   Some people are afraid of growth and of being alone, so they stay in situations that keep them comfortable stuck, and delusional.  So for them, it becomes a long-term lesson, filled with animosity, strife, and misery.   And like most life lessons, some are hard to take.   Especially, if you have been the person living selfishly through the ego and not the heart.  

My lesson was, "Lavidus, just because you have the ability to understand and accept a person's situation does not mean that person deserves to be in your life."  Do you mean to tell me that I am loving this person and there is a chance they can not possibly give me back the love that I deserve?  Yes, it's true.  You have been trying to convince him that he is worthy of your love and he has been showing you that he is not.  So, now it's time to let go.  After that realization, it took me another two years to let go.  But once I did, I was free to receive the love that I deserve, and for him, "the karma for you is gone be who you end up with" Cardi B.  

After that relationship, I was single for a long time.  I am not the type of person who runs from one relationship to the next. I need time to process, and release.  Because once I release you, it's like a death for me.  I love deeply, so if I've ever loved you and released you. Well, you know the result.

When you hold onto people that you should have let on ions ago, it only blocks your progress.  There I was in a relationship, hoping for a better option while giving to the option that I didn't want.   Yes, it made a lot of sense at the time.  But in reality, that type of thinking only had me going in circles while having one foot out the door.  You have to be open to receiving what it is that you believe that you deserve because that is exactly what you are going to get.    No way around it.  Thoughts become things.  We have to make a real intentional effort to spend less time with people who just feed off our good irreplaceable energy.   Spend time with people who make us feel good and the energy is reciprocal.  You feel good when you leave that person and can not wait to be in their presence again.   Yes, that is a good feeling.

Don't be afraid to spend time alone, to love on yourself, and to find out who you really are.  Don't be afraid to leave, cut off, remove, dismiss, block anyone in order to preserve your peace.  Remember, misery loves to have your company.  Buildup the resistance to be validated by people or a relationship. Create boundaries and protect your space, so when the next one appears,  you'll spend less time guessing and regretting and more time creating and making love.

Peace & Love

Lavidus.