"Relationships"

Does your relationship suck? Are you happy?  Are you satisfied or are you just going through the motions?   What kind of relationship are you in right now? Here we are, we have chosen to co-exist in his conflict of personalities, although we have the approval of our friends and society, we are miserable. Or here we are and we have made it so far, there is no one I'd rather be with than you. What is your reality?

There are several different types of relationships, some work and some do not.  Most relationships are based on the agreement of two people to be faithful,  to just have sex with each other, and to hold hands in public.  Others are more conspicuous, they never show public affection, and are insanely jealous but are in an open relationship.  Whatever works, right?  Who defines your relationship? Is it better to hold on to comfort because it's familiar or is it too costly to take a risk on what you really want?

Relationships fall into one of three categories, or maybe all three.  If there are other categories, please chime in, I would love to know your status.  

1. We have been together so long that we are no longer lovers, just friends.  The love is there, but not really.  At this point, it will be too hard to start over and no one puts up with my shit better than you. Although the kids are grown and we are still together this relationship has been over for a very long time and I am just waiting on you to get hit by a bus, Love you.

2.  I love you, but my feelings have changed. I would tell you but the divorce will be too costly and the image we have created together will crumble.  So we will continue to pretend as if we are happy, just like our friends. How embarrassing it would be for our marriage to not last longer than theirs?  I will just have a small affair every now and again and pretend I don't know about your shenanigans and we'll come together on special occasions, and holidays, ok? 

3. It's always new.  You look at each other and you are able to bring out that same fire from day one.  You have had your bad days and you have had your good days, but you have always had each other, so the storms have never been lonely.  People can feel the love between the two of you and it makes them happy.   You give, you serve and you love each other and it shows.

Relationships are always what you make them.  You choose the person, and the time you spend.  Love is whatever you say it is, that definition is up to you.   Relationships help to define us, change us, and to make us better.  Hopefully, you are in a relationship that brings out the best in you even when you are not feeling your best.  Hopefully, you are in a relationship that makes you feel like the greatest, even when you do feel great.  If you are not in a fulfilling relationship, hopefully, you have the courage to change it.  Be with someone who you can completely be naked with, with your clothes on.  Find that love, be that love and you cannot go wrong.

Peace & Love

Teena Marie- Square Biz  💚💚💋Happy Friday!!

Lavidus

Intentional Living

Are you living your life with intention or are you on auto-pilot?  Are you doing the same thing every day, with no variation to the program?  Does your environment support your health?  Why do we live so vicariously through people who are living fake lives instead of honoring and recognizing those who are innovators, the rebellious, the thinkers, and the doers?  The creators, the people who are truly in touch with themselves and unattached to outcomes.  How intentionally are you living?

Every day I wake up, I am grateful, but often I have no real plan and I don't have it all figured out.  I only hope to check off a few things from my to-do list and enjoy my day.  I used to give myself a lot to people, situations, jobs and often found myself with little to give myself.   Once I decided to change that, I began to see the true nature of those people who benefited from my kindness.  It made me even more aware of how much I gave of myself with little in return.  One thing I know about givers is they never really expect anything, they find joy in someone else's joy, but they also can get exhausted and resentful if given to the wrong people or situations.  I decided to go inside and find the core of what I am about and why a lot of things just had to be.  I had to be betrayed to find my strength.  I had to make a few bad decisions to find a better way.  

When you go on that journey of self-discovery you find out a little about who you are each day.  Each day you build on that and become stronger in who you are and in what you believe.  Knowing yourself is essential to healthy living, essential to those necessary boundaries, and essential to how you decide to proceed through life. Each day we decide if it will be a  continuation of the previous day or a whole new day to do something different.  It is always our decision.  If there are any distractions, obstacles, or unexpected things that come up throughout the day, take a moment to think about how you will handle them.  

 

How much time are you spending doing exactly what you want to do?  How often are you in the presence of people who uplift, accept, and love you just as you are?  You do not have to be anyone else but yourself to receive love,  have success, and anything else you want in this world.  But first, accept who you are.  Accept the shitty parts of yourself, as well as the great.  

Self-acceptance is very powerful because it takes away the judgment of others and it forces them to accept what's different and it forces you to stand in that power.  Oftentimes, it also forces those who oppose you to either look at themselves and their actions and accept who they are or fall deeper into the abyss of self-denial. Again, you choose.  

 Life becomes a simple place to exist when you are intentional with your thoughts and actions.  Not only are you aware of what you are doing, but you are also creating your desired outcome. When you are taking care of yourself, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually you are also helping taking care of others. When you spend an exorbitant about of time thinking about what someone else is doing, stalking, gossiping, and complaining, you are taking away from yourself and voluntarily giving up your power to people who barely even think of you.

Aaliyah- At Your Best ( You Are Love)💝💝💖

Peace & Love

Lavidus

Woman!

They seem to be creating these fictitious power struggles between the two when none of us really exist.   All of a sudden, you have forgotten the power that women possess, maybe you do know, that's why all this confusion has been created.  Some of you would not even have a subject to talk about if you didn't talk about women. Some of you would not have a business if you didn’t talk about women.  You want to benefit from us, but not stand up for us.  You need a woman in your business in order for it to be a success.  Period.

Are we replaceable? Can a woman be replaced by something better or equal to?   I think not.  You’ll look like a fool, trying to put those big feet in those small shoes.  Are you trying to redefine what a woman is to include people who are clearly not women?  I am asking for clarification and understanding because I don't want to assume anything.  Women have fought too long in this world, all over the world for simple rights, now you want me to fight for this too? It would be easy if you didn't have to ask what is a woman.  It's obvious you have a clue.  All of a sudden you are unclear about what I am and when you are unclear you have a tendency to not acknowledge what is true.  I am a woman.  I have given birth to two children and at one point in my life, I was faced with the decision to have an abortion.  Have you ever been faced with those decisions?  Have you ever been faced with the challenge and the risk of choosing to carry a child for nine months or more? One in six women will experience sexual assault in their lifetime, how will you prepare your daughters for what they may experience?

A woman is why you, you, you, and you are here.  And if you were lucky you actually came through the canal and were breastfed with the best milk ever.  That's what a woman can do if that is what a woman chooses.  Has anyone ever told you what to do with your penis? It's almost insulting the extent that people will go to delay the inevitable.   Woman, do not take offense, keep your peace and follow your heart. Your intuition should be in overdrive, always trust it. You should be feeling something right now, you should be feeling a need to change the things that you have the power to change. 

What is a woman they say?

Umm yeah let me count the ways

Do you mean after all this time, a woman has never crossed yo' mind?

That is all that is on their mind, all day, every day, Woman.  What if today we decide, we don't want to carry your children.  We don't want to be your wife.  We don't want to be your equal.  We are not opposites or equals.  I don't need your rights, I have my own.  I don’t need your hair laws.  Do you really have to be told to respect someone’s hair?  You should be insulted that you are not mature enough to govern yourselves properly among people who are different than you.  You are different too and would expect the same.  I don't need your job. I don't need your approval.  I don't need your commitment, because I want to be free.  What if today, I decide to just do me.  

I supported your cause and forgot about mine

Raised five kids and nearly lost my mind

Handled the up and downs and your cheating ways

A woman is what I am, every single day!

I don't overuse my makeup

I don't need the glittery stuff

I work hard and play harder too

So give me my credit when the baby's due

What is a woman they may ask

A whole a lot of attitude and maybe some sass

She will climb the highest mountain, just to take a break

Turn it on in the bedroom and bake you a cake  

She can multiply and then divide just to make a point

Consider it done, on repeat, and then smoke a joint

Fight for this country, run this country all done by noon

The tides are turning, disruption is coming, so make her happy or you will see gloom.

It is time to stand up for what you believe in.  Stand up in any way that you feel is right.  We are all sharing this experience together and although we are all experiencing it through different lenses, we can all feel what is happening right now.  Do not get lost in fighting smoke.  It will dissolve and return as something else.  Take off the shades and see things clearly, before you invest your feelings.  Sun gaze new ways because the messages are on tap. Have you felt this before or is this something new? This wave into the future is all up to you.

Peace & Love

Lavidus

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