Bi-Polar Moment!

Have you ever did something and wake up and wish that you never even went there. Yeah, I had one of those moments last night and with an X. Remember how I was blabbing about how an X would be an last option considering all the other options I had, well I got rid of all my options and was left with an X. This is the 2nd time in 5 years that I went back to old faithful and for the second time in five years, I wish I could rewind the tape, it makes you remember real quick why they are X's in the first place.

The night was kind of generic, ya know the late night pick up, then the late night food and drinks. The drinks really got me in the mood and my thought process went out the window. It's amazing how a man acts when he wants something, so I pretended like it was sincere and let the night take it's course. I also knew it would be great writing material.

I am not going to bore you with the details, just know that sometimes it's better to wait for that one who can give it to you just like you like it and however long you want. I almost hate that he spoiled me in that way, but he did and it makes me want him even more, and he knows it. If I were to tell him about last night, he would say that I deserved to not be satisfied because he is the only one that can. Damn, the truth hurts! What I experienced last night must have been the result of the recession.

I am laughing at myself because I lead some men to believe that I am this lonely writer waiting to be rescued and taken care of. Those are just the seeds that I plant. My life is a bundle of joy and I carry "a pocketful of sunshine". Those who truly know me, know what's up, and those that don't, are standing on the sidelines wondering if they could see me tonite. If they only knew.....lol