Are You a Friend or Foe?

I have been blessed with the ability to accept people as they are, without judging.  Unfortunately, that has allowed some people to enter into my life, who never deserved to be there in the first place.  I am too friendly, as some would say.  I can  not even have a simple conversation with a man, without him assuming that I want something from him or I have some ulterior motives.  Take a look at yourself, now look at me, why would you be that person?  I have never been a thirsty woman, or desperate for anything, especially when it comes to men. 

I can not complain that I allowed someone in my life who turned out to be less than a friend.  There was no one there who said that I should or shouldn't (well my real girls was like, really?) But it was my choice, so when they act as they are by being a backstabber, a person who can't be trusted, it should not have been  no surprise to me.  What made me think that being their friend would change them?  Silly me.  The wonderful thing about me is I am not friend "needy".  I have a few real friends, whom I trust and love and we share a true sisterhood of respect.  We enjoy conversation about our lives, loves, children, so when I invite an outsider into my circle and you betray that trust, there is no come back.  I will treat you the same, but from your life, I will disappear. No need to address an issue, no need to argue, or get all political about it.  Just know that I see you, and I believe what I see.

As I have gotten older, the people I call friends have diminished to associates, and the associates have become people I know.   How many of you can call your friend to cry, or vent or just let it all out, with no judgments and without hearing another version of what you shared from someone else?  The level of friendships that I am embarking upon are those made of love and acceptance.  Time out for being a catty woman, or jealous or envying someone else's life.  I love where I am, and love even more where I am going.  As time goes on, I will slowly invite you into my world.  It's an amazing place.

The lesson I have learned is, although I will continue to be my usual friendly self,  I will continue to accept people as they are, I will continue to respect and love those that I meet, however, I will not let anyone in my life that clearly do not deserve to be there.  It's important that you know who  is for you and who is pretending to be for you.  As I heard someone say, "Sometimes losing friends means that you are growing up."   I believe it creates room for those who really deserve to be there. 

It's a new year, and along with getting that new body, having a new or better relationships, starting that business, or making any kind of significant change, you have to get rid of the nonsense that serves no purpose.

Peace & Love, L