Tuesday, November 26, 2013

A short story about People with degree's who spend their time at the Jungle gym.



I  had the pleasure of working at a jungle gym that had more problems than any organization should allow.  The fact that it was ran by a unprofessional, tardy, inconsistent director was clearly an indication that this would definitely come to an quick end for me or her.

It was filled with people who were in love with their titles, a high turnover rate and just plain stupidity.  Jabba, the certified career coach had the nerve to sit down and tell me how all of her friends own business's and that she was this and that. I mean, who sits and talk about themselves to someone who didn't even show any interest of knowing about you in the first place.  I am not a psychologist, but I think it was her way of justifying her insecurities.  A way to promote what she lacked. I thought it was entertaining nonetheless.  Why didn't she talk about her pseudo-happy marriage that didn't turn out as expected?  Being the breadwinner is not for every woman; not being able to ever be surprised by your hubby or taken to dinner or have anything initiated by him due to lack of funds would take it's toll on any head-strong, independent woman in a marriage, especially when he is cheating.  All that work for nothing, better keep that money coming in guurrlll!

Then there was Sally, who coined herself "Genius", but could not figure out how to check a message from a phone line, with the manual in front of her.  Of course you are my dear, a genius among fools; an organizational psychopath.  Her perfection was her flaw, if she made one mistake, she would flush to a bright red, and looked as if  she was about to overdose on anti-depressants. OCD at it's best, she thrived in an environment that she had total control of, otherwise a mental institution was in order.

The Director was a suppressed woman and for obvious reasons, being married to an Mr. Potato Head had it's burdens.  She was the lesser of the two and he apparently had his way, all day and with whomever.  So she acted like any woman who was not getting what she needed at home, by dressing inappropriately and flirting with anything that gave her a dab of attention. If she only knew how much of a mess she looked.  You know there are no clowns allowed in the jungle gym. And you had the nerve to assume I was taking from the cookie jar. Oh Anna Mae.  Sally does not even like you and  Ms. Jabba forget about your bright ideas, they will never be implemented. 

Once I summed up the characters, I begin to play my game to see what character's I can develop.  I begin to tell my own stories. Stories that seemed so unbelievable, at that point I had to excuse myself to go laugh.  I never told them the truth, I gave them enough to swallow, chew and then share with the rest of the cotton stuffed animals.  It was a real life fairyland. Why should I share my great life with these educated cartoon chracter's?   I may be a lot of things, but what I am not is insecure and cheap.  There was no way I could afford my lifestyle on that salary.  So of course, I had other incomes, dummy. I came in way ahead of you.  I do not gossip, that's for simple minds and you all proved that all to well that you are completely comfortable with talking about "other" people.  I do know a lot about a lot of ccharacters so Ms. Director, you didn't have to tell me about your reputation, you have done well to brand yourself as the airhead within the most popular of communities, they see you and just smile with sympathy. No one is jealous, trust me.  You spread your poison to tarnish reputations, when yours is in shambles.  (FYI: People who divert their energy on another person's life, simply have no life of their own).    Be careful what you talk about, karma is a bitch in a red dress and she never fails to return her favors.

After I was done with the foolery, my brains could not take any more, I hit the door flying.  I had saved enough chucky cheese coins for the holidays and to bring in the new year with a grand new plan.  Yes, I  have plans and it includes giving myself in a way that may help someone else.  Not for my ego, but my desire to serve others.  My advice, the next time you want to blame someone else for you being incompetent, make sure they are under the age of 5.  Those are the only people that could survive in your jungle gym.  Sally is book smart, but lacks the creativity to be open to other avenues of getting the play area complete and is not a team player, but a team slayer.

This was written with cartoon characters in mind and none of these people exist, at least not in my world.  Just a day in the life at the jungle gym

Smile for the camera.-----chheeeese.

LLW



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