Blah....oh yeah...

I started writing and realized that tonight I do not really feel like. I am in a funky little mood and I want to be alone with my thoughts.

Well, I will mention that I was part of a "girl talk" session today. We talked about men (love them, need them, want more of him),relationships (when to leave, when to stay, infidelity and dating after being married), Will & Jada ( open marriage, gay or straight?). The penis (big or small everything can be worked out, but prefer it big...lol). Dating a younger man. Since dating younger only really benefits the older man, what does a woman do? Since I attract a number of younger men, I believe that it all depends on his maturity level. I do not want to babysit a man. The last one that rolled up was 24 years old. I just looked at him like, just what are you doing? Really?

The overall message was to love yourself, embrace who you are. It is not until you find out who you are and what you are worth, will you attract what you need in your life.

Ok back to my thoughts, Keep it Special...

Religious, Faith, Spiritual..Which are you?

The later part of my teenage years, I grew up in a religious household. I had a step-father who was a Minister, I sang in the church choir and I participated in every annual church function there was. I was in church on an average of 3 times a week. Though I loved the church, I disliked always having to go. It made me curious about other religions and helped shaped he view that I have about religion today.

There are Christian's that I know who attend church regularly. I am not sure what purpose it serves for them because during the week they are either alcoholics or adultery's, and can be both on any given day. There are the Catholics, who are allowed to be alcoholics as long as you acknowledge that you are and are willing to work on the problem with two hail mary's and a confession. Because you are to refrain from sex and marriage in order to remain pure, please ignore the fact that you can be a gay priest and possibly have ruined more young men's lives then they care to even admit. There are the Muslim's who what they think about their women is in question. I do believe that a woman has her place in regards to a man. I believe the man is the head, and should be allowed to play his part, however, when you totally disregard my existence as a woman, it bothers me. There are many other religions that have their perfections along with imperfections, that is the cost of anything man made. Then comes the people who know there is a God, believes there is a higher power. They pray, meditate and serve other's. They know they are not perfect people, cares deeply for human kind and make a conscious effort to treat everyone with respect, do what is right, forgives and ask for forgiveness when a wrong has been done; that is where I live, that is my existence.

I believe that "God" looks at your heart. No man on earth can tell you what he is thinking. How do you tell the man who is "all knowing" anything. How do you fool him to believe that you won't do that anymore, or that this is your last drink, when he already knows it is not? How do you do anything malicious, wish bad luck on someone and asks for forgiveness when "he" already knows you are not sincere. I mean here is a being that knows your thoughts before you even think them. A lot of people do not know the full power of his existence; too busy believing their own foolishness. The universe speaks volumes on the kind of life you are living, by what happens and how you respond. What kind of life are you living? Are you always having bad luck? Or do things often go your way? Can you truly say that at this point in your life you are happy with the results? The good and the bad. There is no hiding or fooling what is higher in mind, body and soul than you are. How do you compete? It would be a foolish thought to think that you could fool the creator, the one that is responsible for your existence.

My advice in the world of religion is to simply keep it real. The main theme's of most religions is to have faith, do good to others,be honest with yourself, do good not bad. Along with that I would say, do what is right. Have a clear heart and mind. Spread love. Try to live in an existence where all is perfect and complete. Though it may never be reached the good energy that you give just trying to create it will come back in gifts, in many forms and in many places. Nothing happens by accident, everything has a purpose, what's yours?


One Love

Do You Know Me?

I am often amazed at what people think of me. Although at the end of the day I could care less, it's just always interesting how people see me. Let's see, I've heard that I am a flasher, only when you fuck with my kids, money or man, who wouldn't be. I am a bitch, only when you fuck with my kids, money or man. I really don't see what the problem is. The other shit is not worth mentioning, mainly because I cannot remember what it is they said. It is somewhat mind-boddling to find out that the people you think should know you, do not know you at all. They have some preconceived idea about who they think you are without even really taking the time to really know.

See, I know my people. I know how they think, I know how they will react, I know how they move. I know this because throughout history they have never changed. Have you even thought you knew someone and then they do something so far to the left that you cannot believe it? You realize that what you thought you knew may not be true. Or maybe it is true and you just never took the time to accept what is the truth. Maybe they deceived you into believing that they are the person that you wanted to see.  Or even now that you know the truth, you still choose not to see. It can get complicated, but one thing that's always rings true, is a person always reveals itself, even without the permission of the mind. The human mind can play tricks and even be deceptive to the eye and heart. Even when I have thought they were  the better person, they prove to me again that they are not. Maybe I just wanted them to be. Which is another form of deception we create on our own. Believing that a person is one way because that's how we want to see them as oppose to seeing them for who they truly are.

So what do you do? Accept the fact that people change, sometimes on short notice. Accept that even though you may get to a point that you are comfortable knowing this person, there still may be things that you do not know, so don't be surprised. Love them anyway.
Just relax, the human mind and body is in a constant form of evolution. You may not even be the same person you were yesterday,  but the mirror says you are.

Peace & Love