When You Love His Toxic Nature

I will begin by saying that not all men that break your heart, rearrange your thought process and leave you emotionally dead are toxic; I am joking. Of course they are toxic. It does not matter what they look like, their economic background, suits or timberlands; a man who intentionaly breaks your heart is indeed a toxic person. But, why in the process of it all, do we fall heavily for these charming little devils.

I guess my issue was the excitment of it all. The intense energy that passes throught the two of us was undeniable. His toxic nature laced with intelligence or the appearance of, is what drew me in. I knew I coud fix his issues and he confirmed that I could. But, not before he took me for a ride. I mean, I just knew I could fix this motherfucker, but he was a professional in this game and I was just the apprentice. The instability, the I-dont -give-a-fuck-attitude are all the things that kept me turned on and then off, when the shit became a habit. And oh the sex! I allowed him inside where he created water falls on demand. He was the Man! And I was in quick sand, sinking into an illusionary existence, one that was painted pretty. I fell in love with unfounded desires, empty feelings conjured up by real emotions. 

I guess my wake up call was when I noticed him moving on to another. The lies became more obvious, because he didn’t care anymore. The complaning, because, what he used to love he hated now. Then the judging, because the perfection he used to love is flawed now. The texting, because now she is requiring his attention. The calls, that he must answer because he has told her he’s single. The secret shit was no longr secret and could not be ignored. 

I looked at the sorry excuse for an human, yet alone a man and decided that not even his dick was worth savaging. I had to let that little devil go. I guess he already knew of his upcoming expiration date because his attitude changed. I think they always know when the gig is up.

But when they return. 

I almost love it when they return. I mean, only a fool would try to check on me weeks, months or even years later after you've broken my heart. But they do. Pretending to want to relight the candle that they so willingly blew out. Don’t fall for it. They are testing the ground for another round of fuckery. And most of the time, it’s just to check the ground on them having sex. Whatever the case he is back. It either didn’t work out with New Nancy or he received his karma and he feels compelled to apologize. Whatever the case for his return, stand your ground and think, do you really need this lesson again? 

LL Walton, Author Blogger & Podcaster

Follow me on instagram @llwaltonauthor

When Your Soul Screams!

Have you ever felt like something wasn't right?  Have you ever got the inclination that something was changing, happening, but you were not sure when or what?  Have you ever did something that went against your being or beliefs?  You knew it was wrong, but at the moment it felt so right.

Yes, we all do things sometimes that we know is not right, but we do it anyway only to find out that we were correct in the frst place.  I think the thing that keeps us holding on is the fact that we hope it will be what we want it to be.  We hope  that people are who they say they are.  We hope it will be different and we want it to be, so we create or imagine it to be so, even when we know that it really isnt. That intial feeling remains the same.  You do it again and that feeling is getting stronger.  The need to give in and ignore what your soul is telling you can often be the demise of our inner being.  But you keep trying and ignoring, then boom!  Your soul gets so loud that you can no longer ignore it, this time you have to do what you know you should do.  It is no longer a question, the signs are now clear, but now you are hurt, disappointed, mad and discouraged, all because you didn't listen to the screaming of your soul.

When your soul is screaming it's over time to take a new direction.  You have ignored so many of the previous messages, signs and symbols that now the mesasge is loud and clear.  You were warned, you were given the signs and you ignored them all.  But there is still hope.  This time is only a lesson.  A lesson that you will remember and hopefully learn.  Because if you do not, like most classes you will have to repeat it again.  I can not tell you how many classes I've had to repeat.  How many times, I didnt listen, but those moments became my lessons to learn.  Maybe this time you won't be so deaf that you do not hear your soul when it's warning you, changing your direction, or making you accountable for the decisions you make. This time you are prepared to listen. Right?

In the grand scheme of it all, even if you take the wrong direction it too can be the right.  There is something to be learned in every direction, but the key is to listen to what that direction tha is.  I mean, are there really such as thing as mistakes if there is a lesson learned or if there is growth involved.  If it changes you for the better, makes you want to do better?   Every thing happens for a reason, a lesson, test or mistake, these are the things that make us grow and evolve into the master humans that we are born to be.  We are the masters of the universe, we all have free will.  How many of you like to be told what to do?  The next time your soul is screaming take a moment to find out what the universe, god or whatever you believe in is saying because whether you listen or not there is always the oppotunity to learn something about yourself, because really it's all about you.


Love & Peace,

Twitter: @LLWriter
Instagram:  llwaltonauthor

Click the play button Radio Public above to hear the audio version of this post!  Subscribe, Like & Share!







Picture: The Holistic Soul Healer

Some People are Just Idiots!

Greetings Beautiful People....

Did you know that some people are just idiots?

I mean I am not sure if stupidity is the real pandemic that is going on right now or people are just walking around on Cloud 9, I dont know, but you should be aware.

Some people are idiots if you think you can copy & paste and win off of someone else's work.  Don't you want you own noterierty?  Are you not  skilled enough to profit off your own talents?  Maybe one day you'll realize that in this life you never really get away with anything, especially if it's available on the internet.  The world wide web is available to everyone.  So be sure that it's worth it, because when karma, life, and the mistakes you make become known to others, she will demand  and get full payment.  That message was for someone who is obviously  an idiot.  You should know my patience is impeccable, lying in wait like a lion hunting for her prey.  So, are you ready to be eaten?  That was an exceprt from my book of life and it's time to turn the page.

Anyway, it's a new day people, what are you going to do with it?
Are you being amazing, are you capitalizing off this great time in our lives.  Are you happy, sad, bored or stuck in your head?  Then get creative.  Allow your creative juices to be the guide to your success.  Dream big if you dare, because now is the time.  Whatever you desire is right up the street, turn left or right and you will end up in the right place. But be careful who you take with you, not everyone will fit the bill.  Those old baggages need not to be carried, so leave them at the door.  That simple way of thinking need not be used in times like this, so crank yourself up.  Challenge everything you think you know and become anew.

Getting married.......Great!
Getting divorced, even better, that means you both have decided you no longer want to waste your time on what was.  Worried about your wife, husband, boyfirend, girlfriend or any significant relationship, please put it all to rest. Things will work out just as planned, it will all support your highest good.  But the real question is, will you be ready?  Change is painful sometimes, but so is being an idiot.  If there is anything that you are tired of or want to change, then do it.  You are the creator, you are the manifestor.  Everything around you came from your thoughts, even the things you don't like.  So change it.

Hating on someone else because of what they have and you don't, only still leaves you without having those things. Invest in yourself.  And Be honest with yourself.   Some people don't see themselves as great podcasters, writers or authors, or anythiing that can measured by greatness, don't make that your problem, bask in the love you've given.   Turn a bad situation into a great one by changing your perspective.  Instead of thinking in terms of lack, be thankful for what's right in front of you.  Come on Kings and Queens, show the world what you are made of.   Make love, not war, especially with yourself. And more importantly, don't get cuaght being an idiot!!



Peace and Love

Click the link above to listen to this podcast on Radio Public.

Twitter:  llwriter
instagram:  llwaltonauthor

Until The End of Time....

Until the end of time.

There will always be things that last until the end of time. The sun, the moon and the stars were here before us and will be here long after.  We are here until the end of time; constantly changing and transforming into something other than what we were before. 

That's the beauty of the cycle of life.   Creation, Life, then Death.  However, not death in the literal sense, but death in tranformation, death of the old you, only to become anew. You choose to come here and learn, love and share.  Some of you forget why you came here and get lost in distractions and unnecessary jobs, creating unnecessary situations  through the ego.  Some of you get so lost, that living in mental poverty becomes the norm.   I am here to tell you there is so much more to life, than what you think.  I want to remind you of who you really are.

You were designed to be great.  You are great.  The mind, your mind does not  know limits, you do.  Your body is the most magnetic, boundless energy source created.  You are divine.  You came here with the ability to heal yourself, to heal others and to make an impact on your world.  We all have our seperate journeys to travel.  We all have a purpose and missions to complete.  Most of us are looking for things on the outside of us, when all we need is on the inside.   When you go on the inside, you'll know there is nothing to fear, even in the  midst of  chaos, there will be nothing that can remove you from your divine stance. 

Time makes you think you don't have enough of it. Time makes you think you are late.  Get in the mindset that everything happens when its supposed to.  Govern your ownself.  Relax into this new atmosphere, it's changing for the better.  There is always a storm before the calm.  So dream big and do whatever you want.


Live and Die Again


Podcast:  The Relationship Talk Podcast  (Click the link above and enjoy a podcast.)
Twitter: @LLWriter
Instagtram:  llwaltonauthor

2019....The Set-Up!

The last time I wrote on the blog was July 20th. The subject was Karma. I am sure some of you if not most of you have either felt or received your karma. Good or bad it comes to serve you what you truly deserve.  But this post isn’t about you, it’s all about me.

2019 was a tough year for me. There was a lot of unexpected changes, loss of jobs, then gaining a job, moves and a lot of letting go of things and people that no longer serve my highest good. I was tested and talked about. Misunderstood and dismissed. Yes, that was my year. But as December has rolled in, I am more of a woman than I’ve ever been. I have developed a love for myself so strong that even if you thought you knew me then, you definitely don’t know me now. I am unbreakable, spiritually grounded and free.

2019 was the set-up. I was being set-up to receive love, abundance in all areas of my life.  I was being set-up to be built up and now I am here. I will receive all the things I deserve, the things that will manifest into my life will be greater than even I could ever imagined.  The people and opportunities that come my way will be greater than those that have left. I am excited and grateful that I did not give up. Each month has given me something to look forward to and December is no different.   I have to tell you that yes, I realize that there are people who hate my resilience, people who do not understand my poise through adversity.  Please understand that  I am the Empress, a Devine being, infinite in structure.  My skin can stand the heat. I am the creator, my thoughts can give life and destroy.  I am connected and tapped in.

So I must give thanks to all those who told me no, you made me figure out another way. To all you naysayers, you get to watch my glow.  You will reevaluate your thoughts about me and wish you went about it differently.  But for me, it was the you, I needed to see. I am love, I am great, I am Devine. And before you decide to come at me with that bullshit, I am only responding to love.


Peace and Whatever Makes You Happy! ❤️❤️💯

The Hate You Give..Comes back to Visit You

                               KARMA
"They smile in your face when all the while they want to take your place, Backstabbers."  They say you are not on your way until you have haters.  The cowards of the universe.  Sometimes I have to laugh when a person decides to be deceitful.  When trying to play me, you play yourself.  I used to feel sorry for people who never reach their full potential but hate on the fact that you are reaching yours.  But I have also come to terms with the fact that there are a lot of people faking their lives, and going with the misery flow, so they no longer get any compassion from me.  They hate themselves.   So don't ever take it personally and wish them well.

There is a serious divide happening on the earth at this moment.  The people who have fallen for "societies" way of living are finding out that that life s not all it's cracked up to be and they are hating on the people who know themselves and is experiencing true freedom.  The snakes come out, I mean how else can they survive and feel better about themselves but by projecting their lives on the most accessible target.   However, in the midst of this, there is one thing you should know.  Time is circular, it all comes back around.  It all comes out.  A fake can only be fake for so long.  A hater can only hate for so long.  The fact that you have absolutely no love for yourself or others can only last for so long before it all hits the fan.  Your fan that is.

So if the love is gone from your marriage and you are still together just to save face, that too will end.  If you've been abusive and thinking that another piece of jewelry or bigger house will erase the fatalistic being you are, she won't fall for it this time.  If you have a history of being a child molester or pedophile, that too will be revealed.  If you have been spreading lies, and trying to sabotage someone else's blessings, you will suffer the bigger loss.  Your drug habit, your insecurities, your backward thinking will all be properly placed on the karma wheel. Karma comes in to create balance and give you more of what you send out. But it first has to remove people, things and habits that are no longer aligned with who you are.  Let it all fall and let them all go.  They'll have their own fate to deal with. I promise you, your life will be a hundred times greater. The truth can only be hidden for so long.  It's like the full moon that rises with strong emotions only to tear down any falsehood or unfair acts.  It comes to strictly end a cycle and to bring justice to us all.

So if you feel that life is unfair, soon balance will be created.  If you think things will never change, the change is happening right now.  If you believe in who you are and what you bring to this world, then stay the course.   Good or bad, we all get what we deserve.  All those who are jealous,  those who didn't wish you the best and those secretly wishing they were you, will all get to watch your success; and believe me they are watching,


All Love


Twitter: @LLWriter
Instagram: llwaltonauthor

Podcast: anchor.fm/ll-walton

The Enemy Within

Do you really have enemies or is the real enemy within?

Is your adversary really someone who dislikes you or is it someone who is just a reflection of your shadow side?  What I mean by shadow side is the side that you do not show.  The side that may need healing.   The side that may lead people to believe that you are not a good person, or that you are weird or even devilish. 

Your enemy,  if that is truly a real thing, just might be able to show you something about yourself if you look a little closer.   A person can become an enemy without even knowing it.  There are some situations that have manifested itself into your life because that is the way it has always been.  And since you are more interested in being a part of something and not seeing it for what it really is, the cycle continues.  If you were to break the cycle you will become an enemy of the enemy.  A person can become an enemy if they do things that are against a person's free will, impede them in some way or take something that was not willfully given.  However you gain your title, in order to become an enemy, you have to be recognized as one.

From the Montagues and Capulets to the Jones and Williams, born into the enemy cycle. Born into a family and taught to dislike another family for whatever reason.  The cycles will continue without ever getting to the core of the matter.  Sometimes your enemy will be the first one to see your light.  They will envy you based on the fact that they cannot and will not ever be you, so ways are created to dim your light, distract you off your path and make you look like the enemy. Your enemy already knows you,  that's why we rarely are deceived by people we don't know.

 You have the power to choose how you want to navigate your way through this life.  You decide who the people are in your life, so if you decide to keep an enemy around, do it with intent.   There is truth in the saying, "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer."  An enemy will always reveal things to you that a friend won't.  Having an enemy along the way is not all bad, just change your perspective and be willing to see people for who they are and the roles they play and use it to your advantage.


Peace & Love


Twitter: @LLWriter
Instagram:  llwaltonauthor
podcast: https://play.radiopublic.com/ll-walton-GqnarP



Click the play button above to hear this Blog

Photo credit: Know Your Enemy Pt 1 (a2 Church)